Question by : Will my wife ever be happy?
This question is for married women…I’m hurt and confused and have no idea where to turn. My stomach churns and my frustration grows every day.

I don’t want to be a statistic or have my marriage fit the premise of any of the tired marriage jokes…I’m strong enough to change but am looking for honest advice on what I can do to have my love and support show through. I truly love my wife and I believe she truly loves me…

I’m extremely loving, sweet, tender, down-to-earth and generous (and I think good looking, fun to talk to, joke around with, spend time with, etc.) I’m in-shape, ivy-league educated, self-employed, young, and successful. I listened and took into consideration everything my wife was unhappy about through the ~5 years we’ve been married and made radical changes to make her happy at the expense of literally everything and everyone else. I…

-Stopped spending time with my friends and on all hobbies or other interests
-Come home from work no later than 4pm each day and don’t go out evenings or weekends
-Spend every moment that I’m not working with her and our son (2 ½ y.o. sweet little precious boy)
-Help her with any of her projects without hesitation (financially, business-wise, time-wise, advice [which she never takes], I’ve become a “yes-man” in certain circumstances to avoid argument, etc.)
-Moved her to SoCal to a beautiful home thousands of miles from my family and job
-Bought her a new (very expensive) car and provide her with unlimited spending power
-Operate a business full-time, take care of all the bills, do half if not most of the grocery shopping and miscellaneous family errands, pick up my own laundry / dry cleaning, and never bring my work or stress home with me
-Offered to hire a nanny / sitter for our one child so that she can have as much free time as she likes while I’m at work

I also vowed (to myself and her) that I would learn about the things that she’s emotionally sensitive about and adjust the way I react accordingly and have done so (as a guy it’s sometimes difficult to figure out all the feelings and/or angles that a woman may be experiencing / looking at in particular situations but I’m getting better)

She still isn’t happy. She tells me she’s “on her own” and that she feels like a “single mother,” she has “no support” and that “I’m gone all the time” doing “whatever I want.”

[When I ask these questions I’m operating on the assumption that my wife truly loves me]

If there were something you’d change about your husband that would make you happy, what is it? (I don’t drink heavily, smoke, do drugs, eat a bad diet, leave the toilet seat up, no longer hang out with friends, play or watch any sports, etc. so that advice wont help)

Or, if you’re a married woman that truly loves your husband and has every reason to be happy but still you’re not, do you have any idea why (depression, etc?)

Best answer:

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Question by dogluva: Help getting over something that means so much to you.?
I have been dancing for about a year and my dad was so nice in driving me an hour (both ways) for that time. I really appreciated it.

It was always hard. Once a month my dad would have a meeting on the same day as my dance lesson. My mom would occasionally take me on those days. It was always a hassle for them because they both worked and had to take off to take me there. They really have told me that they can’t just take off from work and leave anymore.

Anyway, I used to get so behind and would go sometimes several months without a lesson. I would spend the entire time trying to get caught up, and the ADCRG wouldn’t understand why I didn’t understand what was going on because she only could come to class once a month (she is ADCRG leader of several McTeggart schools). Communication was never good. The school would send us tons of emails that got forwarded to all the parents. My parents couldn’t keep up with them all and neither could I. at least 4 times we drove all the way there and found that it wasn’t going on that day. It was a pain.

I only have been to one feis and I loved it. I did very well for my first time. I placed in all of my dances but only advanced in one dance because of the lack of participants. (I was 14 and about to be 15)

But now it has been months since I’ve last been to Mcteggart. My dad avoids talking about irish dance these days and tries to explain to me that its so hard taking me (driving 2 hours for 1 hour of dancing on dangerous roads). I would drive myself when I am able but my father and my mother have both said that its not safe. I have to agree.. there are many white crosses alongside those roads. I understand.. it was a huge undertaking.

I understand it. I really do. It really was the only thing I could do that was a social activity because my town is small and limited and there are really no activities that you can participate in if you don’t start young. Its simply to awkward and there are literally no beginner levels for my age group for anything. And the worst part – NO irish dance classes. It was the only social, excersize activity that I could do. I was never good at any other dancing (I guess I can’t work both feet AND arms at the same time.. to much coordination involved ). I do art, but obviously thats not going to keep me in shape. And its really hard to excersize on my own with school.

Emotionally I am not okay with quiting ID. I felt so drawn to it 4 years ago when my Aunt was “Irish Man” of the year and I first saw them in the San Antonio parade. I went to the parade 3 times. Each time I renewed my love and desire to participate in ID. Each time I tried to find schools that were near my town. Finally I got to attend summer camp with the Irish Dance school in SA with the school that my aunt was affiliated with. I loved it I found. But SA was 3 hours from my home. So I had to go to a school that was an hour away, even though I always wanted to be at the SA school. I loved the dancing classes while they lasted. It was like my escape. (sooo corny, I know). I try to tell myself its time to quite. I try to tell myself that it is too much of a burden and I’m going nowhere with it. But I can’t get over it. Its pathetic. I can’t move on. Every time I hear one of my irish dancing songs on my ipod, I think of it and I wish I was still dancing. Its terrible.

I don’t know how to move on even if that is whats best for me. I know you think I sound like a freak. I just have excepted the fact that my parents can’t take me there anymore. I’m not going to push it anymore. I’m really crying as I write this. I’m an emotional unhappy camper.

I’m sorry to be such a downer on this board. I guess I just need some advice
I am struggling to replace ID with something as good as it is. But its really hard in this extremely limited, close-minded town. All the sports I feel I am too old to participate in because everyone has been playing for years and I moved here when I was 6 but at the time never had interest in the sports. My parents signed me up for things when I was younger.. I made it to middle school.. tried out for teams and never made it. I was criticized for being too thin and not muscular. I gave up then.

Do you have any advice? I’m really sorry for this long thread post. I’m just venting right now. I would really appreciate any life coaching lol and any opinions.

Best answer:

Answer by John
Too long a question to answer, but try volunteering wherever there are social services. Anything from crochet to brewing beer at home, or perhaps baking, will work.

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Question by nora: Can someone help interpret my dream?
Dream a few nights ago: Bear attacks my friend’s dobermann dog. In a lounge with friends on a big bed and having dinner watching a movie. Feel sexual tension with friend to my right.
Dream last night: Part one, it’s snowing outside and it’s really cold and my grandparents and dad and cousin/friend have to put on a bunch of clothes (i focused on many socks) to run away into the wilderness because brown or black bears are coming to kill us. Everyone is calm and smiling at me in a frustrating way; I am the only one freaking out. We have to write journals about the events, kind of like suicide letters, but no one will give me paper. I am panicking.
Wake up in real life at 5 am, eyes crusty from crying.
Fall back asleep, part 2: we’re on a ship that we can look at through a magnefying glass and then zoom into a room and be in it. ROom full of giants that are angry and dangerous, along with other weird creatures. I tame them though throughout my dream, and in the process i fall in love with another man on ship. ship is in shape of a book. we are at war though, and get bombed throughout. at the end when i tame the giants and creatures in far away room on ship, they are not grateful, and one is especially mean like Grumpy from snow white.
Then i am separated from man i fell in love with, and tell him i will cry for him forever. then i die, my head is cut off. Then i turn into daughter of the woman i see die. Man “i” fell in love with becomes my father and it all turns into a fairy tale my mother is telling me. But the character she talks about is her. Then i am reunited over a radio show with father (some proof i have is a necklace and charms that match with his) and again i wake up crying. Then i am in a clothing store trying to pick out cheap clothes, but i have no money and everything is expensive. i ask person that works there for sales and she says i am too early. I am wearing clothes from the same store though, and i accidentally left the price tags on them. I am concerned of being caught for shoplifting. People i am shopping with is 2 ditzy girls and a personal trainer i met a month ago at a gym. She is telling me of a sale in september and i wanna go but she doesn’t invite me, so i don’t say anything.
what does this mean!?

Best answer:

Answer by Chalie2na
it means you should stop eating pizza after nine o’clock

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Question by : He loves to drink..a little bit too much.What to do?
We have been going out for almost 4 months now.he is like the perfect boyfriend to me.Writes me poems,sings to me,gives me massages,he will draw pictures of hearts for me and write on them and I have two hanging up on my wall right now,he loves to cuddle,loves to hug,tickle,and isnot afraid to show PDA,tells me I am beautiful(not “Hot” thank goodness)says he never wants to leave me.He went through a bad breakup with his ex and he was afraid to love again.He is 19 and going to college at Baylor and we see each other every few weeks.He is the sweetest most charming guy I have ever met and he is really intelligent.He is more or less the sensitive type of guy who at the same time is a “Mans man”.He is mature about things when it comes to sexual stuff.We haven’t had sex(Or made love as he calls it)We discussed how he wasn’t ready to go that far and of course I agreed cause i am in no way shape or form ready for that,he wants that moment to be a special bonding time for us when it does happen,we want it to be perfect.Problem is,he loves to drink it seems.His roommate posted a video on his Facebook showing how wasted he got last night at a Christmas party.OmG he was all laughing over nothing, running into stuff and falling to the floor while his roommate controlled the camera.According to the captions,he puked all over the place after the filming was done.It was kinda funny BUT it is more embarrassing to see the video on his Facebook page than anything considering my mom,sister and nieces all added him as a friend on FB.
It bothered me seeing the video.Now,when he is around me he doesn’t drink.Is this just a college thing with the guys or something? Should I talk to him about it? I don’t want to rub him the wrong way or anything.
* He has met my mother,brother,sister,little niece and nephew so far.
I have met his step-mom,dad and little brother.

Best answer:

Answer by Judy
Does he pay the bills while your living in the etopia . If so God Bless. Could the alcohol be the reason for no whoopee?

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Question by Rusty Shackleford: 15 signs you drank to much?
15 – You spent Sunday night in jail for cow-tipping — with your Oldsmobile.
14 – Although armed with fire extinguishers, friends stood at a safe distance as you blew out your birthday candles.
13 – Thanks to you, Jack Daniels stock is up 15 1/4 since Friday.
12 – Boris Yeltsin called personally to ask you to slow down on the Stoli.
11 – For some reason, there’s salt on the rim of your basketball goal.
10 – Your name is Otis and Sheriff Andy has brought you some of Aunt Bea’s pancakes.
9 – For the money you spent on Thunderbird, you could’ve bought the automobile.
8 – You’re now the proud inventor of the “Slim Jim”: Ultra Slim-Fast shakes made with Jim Beam.
7 – Answering machine full of warnings from Coach Switzer.
6 – Absolut wants to run an ad featuring a picture of your liver in the shape of a bottle.
5 – Yet again, dry cleaner employees greet you with, “Hey, it’s Vomit Man!”
4 – The doorman asks for your I.D. just to see how long it’ll take you to find your pants.
3 – Your liver, in a fit of pique, leaps out of your abdominal cavity into a pan of frying onions.
2 – Worried friends call Monday morning to make sure you returned the goat.
1 – You’re now sober enough to realize “Drink Canada Dry” is a slogan and not a personal challenge.

Best answer:

Answer by MSLETY
11) Too many giant Margaritas…I resemble that remark.Good one!

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Question by Now what?: Do you believe in UFOs (true story)?
Why is talking about aliens such a taboo subject? When people think aliens, other people think “little green men,” which makes it ridiculous-sounding. Some people think you’re absolutely crazy if you believe in other intelligent life in the universe.

When I was a little kid, I picked strawberries from a farm owned by a family friend every 4th of July to make shortcake and other strawberry things. I was out in the field, then all of a sudden it was dusk. The day had simply gone away, I could hear my mom calling me to the house. The whole time I’m walking back, I’m thinking something is weird, I was trying to understand missing time because it had never happened to me before, I was still really young. When I got back inside, my mom asked me where I had been this whole time, and that she was looking for me. I just said “I was in the field,” because I didn’t really know what else to tell her.

Not too long after, I was at another family gathering and we all went outside to look at the stars. I looked up at the sky and started screaming, I hid underneath my dad and was screaming “Don’t let them get me! Don’t let them see where I am!”

That only happened once, another time, my mom was giving me I ride back from a friends’ house one night, I must’ve been about 12. I looked out of the window and saw this giant thing that was shaped like a triangle, it flew over us from the passenger side over to the drivers side. It made no noise, and it had a little light or something in the middle, and there was a red light and the end of each of its corners.

I’ve never told anyone any of these stories, no-one would believe me. I’m scared to tell them to anyone, I don’t understand why it’s such a hard concept or understand. If life exists everywhere it possibly can on Earth, than why not everywhere it possibly can in the universe? The rules of physics and nature apply the exact same throughout the universe, and if it can happen here, life can happen somewhere else too.

My main questions are, do you believe in other life in the universe, and more importantly, do you have any stories?

Best answer:

Answer by Virus
Like a year ago I was walking down the street at 1 am and I saw rotating lights that were green red blue and yellow. I watched it for about 15 minutes slowly flying over me, and then it disappeared.

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Question by Shell F: **Need a true answer*** Please Read,,,?
When I was about 20…I was engaged to a young man …who I like, but I question his sexuality and other things…1) he had a a male friend that I thought was just to close for cofomfort….2) he mention if we had children he was going to go with them…3) he wanted me to drop out of college to support him in his Med career….I call off the engagement…..today he is a successful MD with wife of 25 years…but still have this man in his thoughts..and even has him and this “Man” on his Fb…We recently reconnected after 25 years…we still love each other, but he is so self center it is “All About him” all the time! still….I’m single in my late 40’s …I’ve had some success in my career and I have a wonderful smart teenage daughter that’s doing very well in school…..my daughter’s father is still around and we have family time together….he is very hot-tempered and violent and I did not want to marry him…my ex keeps calling me reminding me what a good life I could have had…he is nice, but I think he is bisexual …and I did not want to deal with that…..I’m a nice person, I cook, nice looking, nice shape still…….now that my daughter is getting older, I would like to find a nice man…w/o all the Drama that goes with it…my question is…do I have be so tolerant of Bull S, Drama, Bisexuality, violence, give up myself to have a man…..? Do I have to play “Stupid” to have a man? Do I have to be Gold-digger that plays games to get a man?….

Best answer:

Answer by Tha MaChin3 d00d
1 + 1 = 2

You wanted a true answer =)

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Question by : How can I gain more self-confidence before college?
ok so im 18
strengths/weaknesses
im going ot a good, not great, college
im a pretty good looking guy, not amazing looking but definitley not bad looking.
i have a nice body, i workout alot and i will workout all summer.
i have alot of friends but not really any real close friends that make me part of a “group” or “crew”, i only have 1 real close friend and we sorta drift around from group to group

i dress nicley and i know girls like the way i dress

i go out to parties and talk to girls and they all like me, every now and then i will hookup with a girl but im not a real player.

im a virgin and want to have sex with someone this summer before college but im sort of scared i wont

i am not very talkative…i am known to be quiet but sometimes funny and outgoing, and ive been trying to talk more but idk i just stick to be myself.

— the main thing i am mad at myself is getting with more girls, and other guys thinking im cool. like i kno this is typical high school but i hate when i text someone at night and they dont respond, or people dont answer my calls…like wtf i want to be known as a cooler person that others look up to but i dont kno what im doing wrong

im not trying to be anyone else, trust me, i have confidence in myself to where i wont change my ways too much, but i need more “swag”, more ways of saying to people “i am the man” without obviously saying that. i want to have that effect on people but not in like a cocky way. im not a cocky person at all and i feel like thats part of why i dont have great self confidence and swag

i need to just stop feeling sorry for myself and get in the best shape of my life, but also need to talk more and just walk around with swag. i hope u guys kno what im talking about and help me out

Best answer:

Answer by Candice™
Hi well here are 4 starters to help u on the road to a more POSITIVE image Cheers ♥

1. Be self-aware and develop a positive self-image
When you trust yourself, are self-aware and can frame yourself in positive terms, your confidence soars
2. Take confidence cues from people you admire
You need to fake it ’til you make it! Consider the way a confident person behaves—observe a friend, relative or colleague
3. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses
If you have a realistic understanding of your own strengths (we all have our strengths) and apply that to your most important and meaningful goals, you have a powerful tool with which to build self-confidence.
4. Beware of barriers to achieving your objectives
If frustrating obstacles or negative feedback cross your path, don’t give up! Developing confidence takes a little persistence. Set realistic expectations: those lacking self-confidence often see an everyday barrier as a signal to throw in the towel. For example, if adult and you’re returning to the social rounds after a divorce, don’t expect to be the life of the party right away—this unrealistic expectation puts too much pressure on you. A good party strategy is to give other guests your full attention. This not only shifts your focus away from thoughts like ‘this is a disaster’, but also makes people around you feel wonderful—a two-way confidence booster!

Same as if you WANT TO BE MORE POPULAR AT SCHOOL then BE INVOLVED in school team activities like via sport, drama, debating classes, in other words being active not only helps makes you popular as long as your not arrogant this also helps stop you from being bullied.

Now go, let others see your no shrinking violet YES!!…… Candice ♥

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Question by : Why do people think that Sicilians are not Italian or a short history of Sicily?
Hello folks,
In reading some of the answers posts I came across one that really got my angry. You can Scroll down to see it. The post in question used the analogy of Hawaii/ USA and Sicily/ Italy. This is ridiculous. Sicily has been part of Italy for thousands of years. In fact Sicily was a provence of Rome long before places like Milan , Torrin, and Venice which at the time Sicily was made a Roman provence and subsequently Romanized, (were not even considered Italian). The people who inhabited these places were Gauls not Italians. Italy was always very regional and Rome as you well know was not created in a day. Rome grew from a small town to a bigger town and gradually swallowed up other parts of Italy that were not Roman but as time went on became Romanized. Sicily was one of these places. Southern Italian cities including Naples were founded by Greeks. At the time of the great Julies Caesar Naples was mostly a greek speaking city just like the rest of the south of Italy. Gradually the south was Romanized. This means the Greeks that inhabited the south of Italy assimilated into Roman Society.
The person who wrote the post below postulates that names like Alfonso are spanish names so this is an indication that Sicily was influenced by Spain. Its the other way around. Alfonso is a latin name that may have been adopted by the Spanish. Spanish is a romance language which comes from Latin. So Spanish comes from Italian….Italian does not come from Spanish. Take the name ” rocco” for example. This is a common Sicilian name. Its actually a German name that was adopted by sicilians and subsequently Latanized from Rockne to Rocco. Normans conquered the arabs in sicily and remained for 300 years hence the name rocco became common.
The south of Italy was also colonized by Arabs and Moors, and Normans which no one ever mentions. It is true that Sicily was colonized by many nations, including Carthage, French/Normans, Arabs, Moors, and the country was briefly controlled by Spain in the 1700-1750 time period. There were no mass immigrations from Spain to Italy. Incidentally, Spain was colonized by Romans thousands of years ago. Spain to Rome was like California to the USA……remember the saying ” go west young man”. In ancient Rome immigrants went to Spain from Italy to colonize.
Yes Sicily has been discriminated against by the mainland for thousands of years. There are political reasons for this that go back thousands of years. I will not go into here. Even now people seem to think sicilians are not genuine Italians like the misinformed guy who wrote the post below. This is simply not true. Try looking it up. Don’t rely on common misconceptions. READ.

Please read the post below. You will have a good laugh.

Is Sicily the equivalent to Italy what Hawaii is to the US?
If you think about the difference in history and culture of both of those islands in comparison to the country’s they belong to, it kind of is. Sicilians for instance, were dominated and occupied by peoples that never stepped foot on any other area in the country and that contributed largely to the ethnic stock of that region, like the moors and arabs and such. The traditions of Sicily are a lot different than the rest of Italy too.
5 months ago
Additional Details
I used to want to correct people who called themselves only Sicilian instead of just Italian but in a sense I think they were right calling themselves only that, just as a Hawaiin can identify with only being Hawaiin rather than American too.
5 months ago

third guy, haha that definitely explains the Sicilian name Salvatore then haha. I definitely agree, i have heard other names that were uniquely Italian but they sounded more Spanish than the average Italian name. I have noticed too that some Sicilians have first names like Alfonso Alonso and other Spanish first names.
5 months ago

sicily didn’t “shape” Italy. Tell to a Tuscan, Venetian, or modern Roman, they would laugh hysterically in your face, almost like what i am doing right now. Sicilians are looked at as the peasants of Italy, with the least amount of credit for anything any region has contributed.
5 months ago

Best answer:

Answer by El
Good for you!

If more people would actually take the time to correct many of the answers & misconceptions “yanswers” would actually be better. or maybe this is the responsibility of answers… it’s a case of “they have allowed the insane to run the asylum”!

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Question by : Thinking of enlisting in the Marine Corps.Advice?
So I’m seriously considering joining the Marines. It has been something I’ve had in mind for a long time, but have always been wrapped up in a different lifestyle. I am now 28 years old and have spent a majority of my life up to now partying and living carelessly. Recently I’ve been thinking of where my life is headed and it doesn’t look good based on the past. While I do live independently, have a decent job, a car, and am relatively comfortable I still feel unfulfilled and don’t feel like an “adult” or a “man” per say. I think the Marines would be the perfect thing for me at this point. I haven’t really spoke to anyone about it yet but am going to see a recruiter soon to get some details. Am I too old at this point? I’m not the strongest man, but I’m not in the best of shape, what can I do to prepare myself for this? Also, I’m a smoker which I think would be a factor in training, I’ve been meaning to quit but never got around to it. This can be the “kick in the a**” I need. Any opinions/feedback would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Best answer:

Answer by Patrick
No regrets, thats what i live by. I plan on joing the USMC to and i had the same questions as you. Your recruiter is a good resource for information, but understand that they will sugar coat somethings. I am luckey to have a good recruitment officer, he told me strait up the hardships of boot camp and what i would be going through. From it i gathered, that you need to be able to run long distances. My advice run every day and take off one day a week, and try to go up a mile on your run every week. Quit smoking if you can, if you think it will make boot camp a little easyier then have at it. you need to be able to do allot of pull ups, push ups and Cardio. I worked up to 3 miles right now and i want to be able to get up to 8 before marine core so i can get a perfect score on the 3 mile run.

Dude all i got to say, and i know i am young but i cant wait to join. I always wanted to and i want a life that i can look back on and be proud knowing that i have no regrets. Good luck man, and i pray you find what your looking for.

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